The Dick Grabbing…..

Subject #1 – Skates (me)

Subject #2 – Stacks

Subject #3 – Little Miss Copper

Settings – Halloween, Texas State University, The Square

Little Miss Copper came right up to me and grabbed me square in the penis. It was Halloween and people were loving my Lieutenant Dangle costume. I had the epic short shorts going on, a fake mustache and aviator sunglasses to top it off. I’m guessing since my junk was so constricted in these shorts and the fact that she was dressed up as a cop as well, she felt the need to full on grab my dick, aggressively. I was shocked. How do you react to a dick grabbing?

Stacks, my wingman for the night, even provided a whistle, walkie talkies and a mini flashlight to solidify our costumes, being that he decided he was going to be Lieutenant Dangle as well. These accessories killed.

Stacks was always the kind of guy that knew how to draw attention to himself through the subtleties. Hell, he even bought a kid floatie in the shape of a giraffe for when we participated in water activities. The giraffe floatie was shaped so the neck of it came thru the legs. It looked like a hard penis when worn, he called it Betsy. He would take Betsy to float the river and even to raging pool parties wearing it around his waist. For some reason women would always come up to ask him about Betsy and touch it’s neck, almost as if they were petting his erection.

He even climbed up an overhang that looked over the pool during one of these parties, where people had been showing off by flipping and doing tricks into the water.  But he did it with Betsy around his waist. When he got to the top everybody started cheering like crazy, only because he had a giraffe neck sticking out between his legs. The crowd started chanting, “USA..USA..USA!” Stacks proceeded to pump up the crowd even more by doing sarcastic raise the roof gestures.  He’d put one hand over his left ear, as if he couldn’t hear the crowd well enough.  Then one hand over his right to make them chant even louder.  Then both hands over his ears to make them go bizerk!  It was the most hilarious thing I’d ever seen and the crowd was loving it!

After he felt like he pumped up the crowd suffiecently with all of his antics, he proceeded to jump off the overhang with Betsy around his waist. No tricks, just with gimmicks and a giraffe. He hit the water and BOOM. Betsy was dead. As Stacks emerged from the water he simultaneously started spinning the deflated, killed Betsy over his head. At that point the crowd went nuts. Needless to say, Stacks was one hell of a fun person to go out with! He knew how to draw attention in a crowd and was one hell of a wingman.

The fact that Stacks and I were two matching Lieutenant Dangles blowing our whistles in the bar at each other as well as at women created a lot of attention. We’d even go up to girls in their slutty costumes and shine our flashlight at them from above their heads. We would then walkie the other, “We got a Code Red, hottie with a body in a skimpy outfit, you might want to come take a look at this.  Over.” The reactions we got from this were priceless. Half the time they thought we were really cops. After the initial shock wore off they started to want to play with our toys, blowing our whistles and putting their mouths on our walkies. These costumes were a hit.

We were at The Square in San Marcos, which was essentially the bar scene in a college town at Texas State. It had four streets in the shape of a square with bars all around it. Texas State had the reputation for having the hottest, sluttiest college girls in the state. Hence, the dick grabbing I encountered by Little Miss Copper. She was dressed in one of the hottest cop outfits of the night, except mine of course. I looked good. The fake mustache put me over the top and created some bizarre desire within the girls at The Square. They were drawn to it. I was waiting for a spot at the crowded bar top to open so I could order a drink when I noticed Little Miss Copper swooped in next to me.

She went the whole nine yards with her cop outfit. She had one of those cop hats on that you only see in a porno, with aviators covering her sex eyes. She had the navy blue top on, which was buttoned down enough to show perfect cleavage with a pin-on plastic badge over her left tit. Paired with what looked to me like navy blue spandex that were short enough to show some butt cheek and tight enough to where her ass couldn’t breathe. She capped off her sluttiness with tall, black, leather high-heel boots. She played the part too, as if she was some stripper cop that was going to punish you with her vagina. Luckily, I was in the zone that night and remained in my “Lieutenant” alter ego as well.

“We got an intruder here at the bar top, trying to pass off as cop. I believe she’s a fake and maybe her rack too!” I walkie’d Stacks loudly, as I’m looking directly at Little Miss Copper.

Looking at me with her mouth dropped, almost as if she was getting ready for a penis to enter it, “Excuse me! How dare you! These tits are real, I’m going to have to arrest you for that comment. Hands behind your back!”

I put my hands behind my back, “Oh no, what are you gonna do? Restrain me?”

“Yes, I am!” She bites her lower lip and unexpectedly grabs my dick and balls, “Behave!”

We were in the middle of the bar and I’m standing with my hands behind my back as she has my twig and berries grasped in her palm. Not painfully though, she was foundling them. As much as I would’ve loved to get jacked off in the middle of the bar, I stepped back.

“Woah, woah, woah. I think we are gonna have to save this for later, sex kitten.” I spank her ass as I walk away.

Her ass deserved a slapping after that. I could tell she loved it. I never had my dick grabbed before in the middle of a bar by someone I spoke only two sentences too. At first I was shocked and had to comprehend what was happening as she was playing tug of war with my penis. After the initial shock, I realized I had a slootie on my hands, who would’ve loved for me to Lieutenant Dangle my balls in her mouth. I knew she’d come back for more. I was currently having too much fun on this Halloween night with Stacks doing ridiculous shit. I knew a girl of that slut caliber would find her way over to me. They’re dick magnets.

I find Stacks on the other end of the circular bar top waiting for a drink as well. I tell him the story. He starts looking around for the porno cop outfit I described.

“We need to find this dick grabber!” He looks into the crowd searching.

“Ah, I know she’ll slut her way back over here eventually.”

As I finish my sentence I feel someone grazing over my right butt cheek and then firmly grab my left. I look over my left shoulder and it’s Little Miss Copper. She hands me a bar napkin gives me a sex look and continues to walk out of the bar. As she exits, I look down to my left hand and unfold the napkin only to find her number written on it. It was signed, “Sex Kitten”.

I would’ve loved to skidilly doo in her mouth that night. I folded the napkin back up and put it in the pocket of my short shorts for later. Bros before hoes. I knew she’d grab my dick again soon enough. Stacks and I went to the next bar. The night continued.


Knowing that you are out to have a good time with your friends should be your main priority. Everything else will follow. There is no way I was going to become preoccupied with a slutty cop and leave Stacks hanging for the night. Having this mindset with women will set you apart from other men. In doing so, women will mentally set you apart as well and view you as a chase, a challenge and an Alpha.

If some girl comes up to you and grabs you in the dick it doesn’t mean you should follow her around the rest of the night. Don’t be desperate. Think about if you exchanged a few words with some random chick and then all of a sudden you honked on her boobies, how would that pan out? You would probably get slapped, yelled at and kicked out of wherever it is you are. She definitely wouldn’t be following you around after that. Men on the other hand believe that a good dick grab every once in a while should be encouraged.  Even though we would prefer to get our packages grabbed it doesn’t mean it is socially accepted. So walk away, play hard to get and make her think. Don’t start humping her leg, being desperate and blowing your wad on buying her drinks after the fact. She doesn’t need her leg humped. In any interaction with a woman you just met, dick grabbing or not, you don’t won’t to be the guy that sticks around too long.   You want to be the guy that she is interested in and hopes to run into again later in the night.

After she laid her hand on my sausage the last thing she expected was for me to walk away. Enticing her with a nice ass slap solidified the sexual tension. Her ass was fair game to slap, she crossed the boundaries first, remember? Lingering around after that may have created a lengthy conversation, with increasing disinterest on her end. Yeah sure, I may have gotten her number by sticking around anyway but the ground work laid wouldn’t be in my favor, it would be in hers. Create interest by leaving at the peak of the interaction. In my case, I left when she reached the tip.